Memories best left forgotten
by Pilser
Summary: Iroh left out some details about the disgracing of Zukos. Just a warning but RAPE. If you want a fic about Zuko telling Aang, you will have to ask for it.
1. Not so bad

Zukos' eyes tracked his uncle, watching as he moved towards his cabin.

Probably to drink some tea, whenever he spoke about what happened that day, it always seemed to leave a bad taste in his mouth, he always seemed to slip away to avoid it.

Zuko loved his uncle; he really did, but part of him still blamed Iroh for not helping him.

'He couldn't help', the logical part of his brain reasoned. But logic could never win over pure emotion, and no matter how many times he told himself this, he was never convinced.

His reasoning always bought back memories from that day, making him bitter; he hated everyone, including his uncle, but this hatred he knew was unjust, causing the emotion to become self loathing.

He hated weakness, despised it even, and no matter how many times he tried to convince everyone that he was training to defeat the avatar, his uncle knew otherwise and was never truly convinced.

Turning back out to the water, his eyes were drawn to the setting sun, he took in the array of colours and watched how the clouds were split with the colours of the element he bended.

No matter how much he tried to enjoy it he hated sunsets.

They always reminded him that even if he was suffering the world would keep turning.

Turning around and heading to his room, his previous thoughts echoed in his mind no matter how far away he pushed them.

(LATER THAT NIGHT)

 _Zuko spun around at the same time as his opponent, expecting to see the man he had insulted directly._

 _He was ready to show his father that he was worthy of being his son. That he could prove he was worthy of being prince Zuko and that it wasn't just a pretty title._

 _What he didn't expect when he spun around was to come face to face with his father, they widening of his eyes revealed his shock and sudden fear that over took and froze his body to the spot._

 _Like always the memory blurred until he felt the heat of his fathers' flames and the sting of his flesh burning, the sickeningly sweet smell of burning flesh filled the air, causing him to feel as sudden hatred of fire bender, as well as grudging respect for the flames that now destroyed his face._

 _All thought process stopped when the flames did, turning to the side Zuko couldn't help but vomit, his stomach no longer able to hold in his recent meal._

 _Glancing up at his father, what he saw in the mans' face made him freeE in fear yet again, a terrible mistake even after the fight was over._

 _The hatred reflected back at him struck him deeply, permanently fusing itself into his soul._

 _He unknowingly began to remember all the comments he heard while sneaking around about how he looked like that late mistress of the house, his mother._

 _He knew about the rumours, his uncle told him about how he inherited his mother features and caring nature, he always found it strange that Azula got nothing from their mother. Maybe their was truth in what they said, what if Azula truly wasn't his sister, pondering these thoughts for the first time, he finally began to recall every little detail that pointed to the truth, how could he have been so blind how could he not see, Azula always did favour their father, but never 'his' mother._

 _This realisation made everything click, the reason his father looked at him with such sadness and hatred. The reason he hated but loved him. His face must have revealed something because when he looked up again into his fathers face he saw the ever present look in his father eyes disappear for a second._

 _It wasn't long but in that second he saw the father he remembered from his childhood. The man that saw him, and not his mother The man that was happy and that cared about those around him._

 _The moment ended and the spiteful look returned again, so great in intensity it caused Zuko to shake in fear._

 _Frozen in place he could only watch in horror as his father turned to the crowd and began to speak._


	2. Just gets worse

_"Defiance and disobedience. These are things that I shall not tolerate, and through me the fire nation. The nomadic monks or air benders defied us, and now what are they? A charred corpse living atop a ruin. Disobedience will be punished both physically and mentally" his chillingly emotionless voice rang loud in the deafening silence; as he said this Zukos father turned towards him and began to reach for the ties that held up his pants._

 _Zuko began to move backwards on his hands and knees, away from his father and the deranged look in his eye._

 _He knew this method, it was the same one that could demoralise an entire nation._

 _He flipped over and began to crawl to the side glancing around for help. But no one would help him, they would never defie their lord. Zukos retreat was halted by a harsh tug to his ankle, He was yanked back, his knees scraping along the ground._

 _The humiliation alone made him want to die, and it had only just begun._

 _In a flash zukos pants were gone and a searing pain spread through his ass and up him spine and hips._

 _The move was so sudden that the air was knocked out of him and he couldn't manage a scream. Just a choking noise as he tried to force air into his lungs._

 _Ozais retreat is what finally triggered a sound. Zukos piercing scream rent through the air loud in the stunned silence that had taken hold of the observers. The look in their eyes revealed their thoughts, even this was too harsh a punishment._

 _The women in the crowd began to wretch as another scream was driven from his throat. Followed by the maniacal laughter of the man at his back._

 _The man he called father._

 _Ozais hands were on either side of his hips gripping with such force it would bruise, his pelvis ramming into Zuko with each thrust._

 _He could feel a warm liquid running down his legs and glanced down to find blood staining his legs and pants._

 _Each thrust caused fire to erupt in his ass, his knees scraping along the ground as they were rubbed raw._

 _Tears began to blur his vision, but only seeped from his eyes when he felt Ozais release within._

 _The tears ran freely down his face and he tasted blood from where he had bit the side of his mouth to keep from screaming._

 _The ground rose to meet his face as he was dropped unceremoniously to the floor._

 _Through to the ringing in his ears and the quiet murmurs of the crowd that had begun again in sporadic bursts._

 _He heard his father declare his exile, until he could regain his honor through his death or the capture of the avatar._

 _He was given one hour to leave and the crowd was told to disperse. The shuffling of feet soon followed until all was silent, Zuko lay there thinking he was finally alone, but he was wrong._

 _He heard his father speak again. The last words he ever spoke to him._

 _"You are beneath me and that is where you will stay, do well to not forget that"._

 _The sound of retreating boots soon followed that statement and Zuko was left on the floor covered in blood and cum; sore and more broken then he had ever been._

The dream always ended there, he never dreamt about his uncle helping him up and cleaning him. Or his uncle staying with him after.

He only ever dreamt about the pain, humiliation and the fact that no one helped, they simple looked on.

The dream always tore him up on the inside, but also renewed his determination to find the avatar.

He would return home with his honor and with the whole fire nation hearing and knowing that he; the disgraced prince succeed where his father and their mighty lord had failed.


End file.
